A humble self-knowledge is a surer way to God than a search after deep learning.
– Thomas A Kempis
Hi friends,
I hope summertime has been treating you well and you’ve had the chance to get away and enjoy a book or two poolside, oceanside, or lakeside.
If you’re like me and love to read but don’t have the time to invest in a novel, than I have the perfect summer reading for you! The book is a fascinating quick read. It’s titled The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile.
You may be familiar with the Enneagram taught in this book or like me, be new to the nine-sided figure that helps you recognize personalities and how they relate to each other and the world. Either way, the Road Back to You, clearly defines each personality and applies real life-applications.
As I read through the nine number types, I was captivated by the personalities described and began trying to place people I knew into them. When I came to my personality I felt a little stunned. Never before had a personality test entered into the inner me so completely. The letter and animal personality tests I’d taken before did nothing more than say “This is you! Good job, this is what you do.” I quickly realized the enneagram was something different. It is not a typical personality assignment about what you do but instead a spiritually inspired definition of why you do what you do.
The Enneagram brings awareness to the spiritual aspects of our personality and helps us discover who God created us to be. It digs deep and shines light into the darker places of ourselves. This book gave me a clearer understanding not only of my personality but of the others in my family. Understanding our differing motivations has deepened my compassion towards Jesse and our kids.
What the Enneagram has taught me:
1. Discovering My Number: I’m a four – the Romantic.
At the beginning of each chapter are ten characteristics of the following Enneagram number. As you read you’ll discover the way each personality displays itself in times of stress and times of security as well as how it relates to work and relationships. Some of us will fit into our number like a glove and others will need to discern and work towards figuring out where we fit. Not every characteristic of a number four applied to me but as a whole I had found my place. Discovering your number doesn’t necessarily leave you feeling proud because it speaks to both the strengths and weaknesses you posses.
2. Discerning my “deadly sin” allows me to improve and protect myself. The bible speaks so clearly about the spiritual battles surrounding us and the enemy uses our weakness to separate us from God. If we dont know our temptations than we cannot protect ourselves from attack. My sin is envy and at first sight of the word I wanted to argue that I rarely feel envious of others. But I continued reading about this sin and an example immediately came to my mind. When Josiah died, a friend told me how blessed she felt with her life after watching me go through child loss. She had no idea but her words struck a tender spot in my heart and made me question how God felt about me. Because what I heard Satan whisper in her words was “God loves her more than you. She has all her children.” By reading this book I was able to recognize I’m prone to question God’s love for me based on the amount of suffering I experience in comparison to others. I really appreciate how honest the enneagram is about our weakness!
3. Perhaps the greatest gift this book gave was a deeper understanding of my children’s personalities. Each member of our family has a different number. Jesse and I have struggled to understand one of our children who is wired differently than us. We almost cried as we read their number and for the first time, felt like someone understood them and helped us to understand them too. And that’s the beauty of the enneagram-a lesson in developing compassion for ourselves and others. Just because we are different doesn’t mean we are wrong. Just because some personalities may be more “likable” or “socially acceptable” doesn’t mean that each personality is not valued and designed by God. Each number on the Enneagram depicts an aspect of God’s character. Not one character is above the other and all are used on earth to bring him glory. How beautiful and diverse is his creation!
I encourage you to read and have fun with this book. It’s easy to remain lethargic to self-improvement because it requires reflection, vulnerability, and work. So I’ll warn you now, this book makes you feel a little uncomfortable with yourself. But if you dare to read it, you’ll have taken a great first step to understanding why God created you for the good works he’s called you to.
If you do take my recommendation let me know what you think. I’m anxious to know your number too!
I should also add that if books aren’t really your thing- you can still learn about the Enneagram through the Road Back to You podcast.
♥
The beginning of love is the will to let those we love be perfectly themselves, the resolution not to twist them to fit our own image. If in loving them we do not love what they are, but only their potential likeness to ourselves, then we do not love them; we only love the reflection of ourselves we find in them.
– Thomas Merton